Thread: Poems that you find

petal · 16-08-2006, 08:57 PM

CHUTNEY
by
Carol David

The day that our Mother made Chutney -
That's a day I will never forget,
It's been fortythree year in the eating
And we've still ninety jars of it yet.
The vinegar came in a tanker,
The mustard seed came in a sack,
And eight or nine artics from Pickfords
Dumped the twelve ton of apples out t'back.
When she started to boil that Chutney
The 'ole 'ouse o' Chutney did reek,
And even the cat smelt o' Chutney
And went off 'is food for a week.
We 'ad sixteen saucepans full o' Chutney
And it sizzled and pobbled and spat,
It were so strong we 'ad to wear gasmasks,
All of us, including t'cat.
It dissolved all the paint off of ceiling,
It corroded the back of the fridge,
It 'ung in a cloud in t'garden
Where it killed the occasional midge.
We daredn't sleep for fear that the Chutney
From out of its saucepan might creep
And slither upstairs to us bedroom
And strangle us all in us sleep.
At last all the Chutney were ready,
The splutting and hissing could stop,
And every available jamjar
Were Chutney filled up to t' top.
Pretty soon we 'ad run out of jamjars,
Though we'd got seven hundred and two,
So the kettle were filled up wi' Chutney
And the sink, and the washbasin too.
Then finally we plucked up courage.
Intrepidly we took a taste.
The Chutney were - strewth! - pretty awful
But Chutney is too good to waste.
So we thought of a host of good uses
For this pungent, inedible goo -
It filled up t'cracks in t'ceiling
And were super for cleaning t'loo.
And to all of our friends and relations
A dollop o' Chutney were sent,
But each were returned wi' the message,
"We've given up Chutney. For Lent."
Then we tried to dump Chutney in t'Ocean
But folks from Greenpeace came to say
Where pollution's concerned they'd far rather
'Ave nucular waste anyday.
Well. We thought Mum's preserve days were over
And we all sighed great sighs of relief,
For fortythree year chewing Chutney
'Ad fairly dissolved our teeth. This year we'd a good crop o' gooseberries.
Mum blew dust off old Chutney pan.
Now we're all leaving 'ome on account of
She's starting on gooseberry jam......

petal · 20-08-2006, 02:54 PM

Short............but made me chuckle.................lol

My face in the mirror
Isn't wrinkled or drawn.
My house isn't dirty.
The cobwebs are gone.
My garden looks lovely
and so does my lawn.
I think I might never
Put my glasses back on !!

petal · 22-08-2006, 12:29 PM

COMPARISONS

If you've never trod the valley,
You can never see the heights,
If you've never walked in darkness,
You'll never see the light,
If you do not climb the hill ahead,
You can't look round the bend,
If you're never really lonely,
You'll never need a friend,
If you've never failed, and failed again,
You'll never try your best,
If you've never suffered sleeplessness,
You'll never know true rest,
If you've never stumbled through the clouds,
You'll never see the blue,
If you've never suffered grief or pain,
Real joy won't come to you,
For the one calls forth the other,
As onward we must go,
Don't ask me how I found this out,
Let me just say "I know".

nanna · 22-08-2006, 09:56 PM

Beautiful poem Mary and so true.

petal · 25-08-2006, 05:08 PM

GOSSIP TOWN

Have you ever heard of Gossip Town on the shore of Falsehood Bay,
where old Rumor, with rustling grown, is going the lifelong day?
It isn't far to Gossip Town for people who desire to go.
The idleness train will take you down in just an hour or so.
The Thoughtless Road is a popular route, and most folks start that way;
But it's a steep downgrade; if you don't look out, you'll land in Falsehood Bay.
You glide through the valley of Vicious Folk and into the tunnel of Hate;
Then crossing the Add-to-Bridge, you walk right into the city gate.
The principal street is called "They Say," and "I've Heard" is the public well.
And the breezes that blow from Falsehood Bay are laden with "Don't you tell."
In the midst of the town is Telltale Park; you're never quite safe while there.
For its owner is Madam Suspicious Remark, who lives on the street Don't Care.
Just back of the park is Slander's Row; twas there Good Name died,
pierced by an arrow from Jealousy's bow in the hands of Envious Pride.
From Gossip Town peace long since fled, but trouble, grief, woe,
sorrow, and care you'll meet instead if ever you chance to go.

petal · 28-08-2006, 10:34 AM

They think that I should cook and clean, and be a model wife.
I tell them it's more interesting to study Grandpa's life.
They simply do not understand why I hate to go to bed . . .
I'd rather do two hundred years of research work instead.

Why waste the time we have on earth just snoring and asleep?
When we can learn of ancestors that sailed upon the deep?
We have priests, Rabbis, lawmen, soldiers, more than just a few.
And yes, there's many scoundrels, and a bootlegger or two.

How can a person find this life an awful drudge or bore?
When we can live the lives of all those folks who came before?
A hundred years from now of course, no one will ever know
Whether I did laundry, but they'll see our Tree and glow . . .
'Cause their dear old granny left for them, for all posterity,
not clean hankies and the like, but a finished family tree.

My home may be untidy, 'cause I've better things to do . . .
checking all the records to provide us with a clue.
Old great granny's pulling roots and branches out with glee,
Her clothes ain't hanging out to dry, she's hung up on The Tree.

by: Mel Oshins

petal · 28-08-2006, 03:21 PM

Lozzie sent me this..........worth remembering

Remember...a layer of dust protects the
Wood beneath it.

Dusting

"A house becomes a home when you can write
"I love you" on the furniture."

I can't tell you how many countless hours
that I have spent CLEANING!
I used to spend at least 8 hours every weekend
making sure things were just perfect --
"in case someone came over."
Then I realized one day that no-one came over;
they were all out living life and having fun!
Now, when people visit, I find no need to
explain the "condition" of my home.
They are more interested in hearing about
the things I've been doing while I was
away living life and having fun.
If you haven't figured this out yet,
please heed this advice.
Life is short. Enjoy it!

Dust if you must,
but wouldn't it be better
to paint a picture or write a letter,
bake a cake or plant a seed,
ponder the difference between want and need?

Dust if you must,
but there's not much time,
with rivers to swim and mountains to climb,
music to hear and books to read,
friends to cherish and life to lead.

Dust if you must,
but the world's out there
with the sun in your eyes the wind in your hair,
a flutter of snow,a shower of rain.
This day will not come around again.

It's not what you gather, but what you
scatter
that tells what kind of life you have
lived.

mollie · 06-09-2006, 06:18 PM

Thought this might make you chuckle . Try saying it after one or three............lol

Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not.
So it's better to be Shott than Nott.
Some say Nott was not shot, but Shott
swears he shot Nott.
Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not
shot or Nott was shot.
If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was
shot.
But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott himself,
Then Shott would be shot and Nott would not.
However, the shot Shott shot shot not Shott
but Nott.
It's easy to say who was shot and who
was not.
But we know who was Shott and who was Nott.

anon.

izabellanne · 09-11-2007, 05:44 PM

I love this poem my cousin sent me for my birthday this year. I thought I would share it with you...

Dear, dear Ann,If you could see your cousins
All standing in a row,
Could YOU tell one from t'other ?
How would you really know ?

And if it was their birthday
on 20th September,
And you never bought a card
Because you didn't remember,

Could you possibly write a pome
To make up for senile doziness ?
Saying "Have a wonderful time,
And may all your birthdays bring coziness,

Dishy cakes and super presents,
Plus everyone's affection
For this world's funniest cousin,
Absolutely without exception.

I wish you TONS of presents,
And birthday cards galore,
For YOU should ever be celebrated,
That's what birthdays are for.

I wish you HAPPY BIRTHDAY,
I'm SO sorry I missed the date,
Will make up for it at Xmas,
If that ain't too late.

Meanwhile celebrate yourself
For all the joy you bring
To everyone who knows you,
You really make us sing.

Starlight · 09-11-2007, 07:48 PM

What a lovely poem izabellanne. Better than any card.

16-08-2006, 08:57 PM	#51 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,553 Total Awards: 5	Re: Poems that you find CHUTNEY by Carol David The day that our Mother made Chutney - That's a day I will never forget, It's been fortythree year in the eating And we've still ninety jars of it yet. The vinegar came in a tanker, The mustard seed came in a sack, And eight or nine artics from Pickfords Dumped the twelve ton of apples out t'back. When she started to boil that Chutney The 'ole 'ouse o' Chutney did reek, And even the cat smelt o' Chutney And went off 'is food for a week. We 'ad sixteen saucepans full o' Chutney And it sizzled and pobbled and spat, It were so strong we 'ad to wear gasmasks, All of us, including t'cat. It dissolved all the paint off of ceiling, It corroded the back of the fridge, It 'ung in a cloud in t'garden Where it killed the occasional midge. We daredn't sleep for fear that the Chutney From out of its saucepan might creep And slither upstairs to us bedroom And strangle us all in us sleep. At last all the Chutney were ready, The splutting and hissing could stop, And every available jamjar Were Chutney filled up to t' top. Pretty soon we 'ad run out of jamjars, Though we'd got seven hundred and two, So the kettle were filled up wi' Chutney And the sink, and the washbasin too. Then finally we plucked up courage. Intrepidly we took a taste. The Chutney were - strewth! - pretty awful But Chutney is too good to waste. So we thought of a host of good uses For this pungent, inedible goo - It filled up t'cracks in t'ceiling And were super for cleaning t'loo. And to all of our friends and relations A dollop o' Chutney were sent, But each were returned wi' the message, "We've given up Chutney. For Lent." Then we tried to dump Chutney in t'Ocean But folks from Greenpeace came to say Where pollution's concerned they'd far rather 'Ave nucular waste anyday. Well. We thought Mum's preserve days were over And we all sighed great sighs of relief, For fortythree year chewing Chutney 'Ad fairly dissolved our teeth. This year we'd a good crop o' gooseberries. Mum blew dust off old Chutney pan. Now we're all leaving 'ome on account of She's starting on gooseberry jam......
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

20-08-2006, 02:54 PM	#52 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,553 Total Awards: 5	Re: Poems that you find Short............but made me chuckle.................lol My face in the mirror Isn't wrinkled or drawn. My house isn't dirty. The cobwebs are gone. My garden looks lovely and so does my lawn. I think I might never Put my glasses back on !!
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

22-08-2006, 12:29 PM	#53 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,553 Total Awards: 5	Re: Poems that you find COMPARISONS If you've never trod the valley, You can never see the heights, If you've never walked in darkness, You'll never see the light, If you do not climb the hill ahead, You can't look round the bend, If you're never really lonely, You'll never need a friend, If you've never failed, and failed again, You'll never try your best, If you've never suffered sleeplessness, You'll never know true rest, If you've never stumbled through the clouds, You'll never see the blue, If you've never suffered grief or pain, Real joy won't come to you, For the one calls forth the other, As onward we must go, Don't ask me how I found this out, Let me just say "I know".
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

22-08-2006, 09:56 PM	#54 (permalink)
nanna Ancestry Aid Staff Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Liverpool, Merseyside.U.K Posts: 11,524 Total Awards: 3	Re: Poems that you find Beautiful poem Mary and so true.
	Nanna Ancestry Aid Moderator The UK's No 1 For Genealogy & Family History. Researching Crowe,Radcliffe,Sayle,Quarrie,Comaish,Lee (Isle-of-Man,Liverpool & Birkenhead) Swift (Liverpool & Lancashire) Peters (Anglesey,Liverpool & Widnes) McCabe,Williams (Liverpool) Thomas (Anglesey)

25-08-2006, 05:08 PM	#55 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,553 Total Awards: 5	Re: Poems that you find GOSSIP TOWN Have you ever heard of Gossip Town on the shore of Falsehood Bay, where old Rumor, with rustling grown, is going the lifelong day? It isn't far to Gossip Town for people who desire to go. The idleness train will take you down in just an hour or so. The Thoughtless Road is a popular route, and most folks start that way; But it's a steep downgrade; if you don't look out, you'll land in Falsehood Bay. You glide through the valley of Vicious Folk and into the tunnel of Hate; Then crossing the Add-to-Bridge, you walk right into the city gate. The principal street is called "They Say," and "I've Heard" is the public well. And the breezes that blow from Falsehood Bay are laden with "Don't you tell." In the midst of the town is Telltale Park; you're never quite safe while there. For its owner is Madam Suspicious Remark, who lives on the street Don't Care. Just back of the park is Slander's Row; twas there Good Name died, pierced by an arrow from Jealousy's bow in the hands of Envious Pride. From Gossip Town peace long since fled, but trouble, grief, woe, sorrow, and care you'll meet instead if ever you chance to go.
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

28-08-2006, 10:34 AM	#56 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,553 Total Awards: 5	Re: Poems that you find They think that I should cook and clean, and be a model wife. I tell them it's more interesting to study Grandpa's life. They simply do not understand why I hate to go to bed . . . I'd rather do two hundred years of research work instead. Why waste the time we have on earth just snoring and asleep? When we can learn of ancestors that sailed upon the deep? We have priests, Rabbis, lawmen, soldiers, more than just a few. And yes, there's many scoundrels, and a bootlegger or two. How can a person find this life an awful drudge or bore? When we can live the lives of all those folks who came before? A hundred years from now of course, no one will ever know Whether I did laundry, but they'll see our Tree and glow . . . 'Cause their dear old granny left for them, for all posterity, not clean hankies and the like, but a finished family tree. My home may be untidy, 'cause I've better things to do . . . checking all the records to provide us with a clue. Old great granny's pulling roots and branches out with glee, Her clothes ain't hanging out to dry, she's hung up on The Tree. by: Mel Oshins
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

28-08-2006, 03:21 PM	#57 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,553 Total Awards: 5	Re: Poems that you find Lozzie sent me this..........worth remembering Remember...a layer of dust protects the Wood beneath it. Dusting "A house becomes a home when you can write "I love you" on the furniture." I can't tell you how many countless hours that I have spent CLEANING! I used to spend at least 8 hours every weekend making sure things were just perfect -- "in case someone came over." Then I realized one day that no-one came over; they were all out living life and having fun! Now, when people visit, I find no need to explain the "condition" of my home. They are more interested in hearing about the things I've been doing while I was away living life and having fun. If you haven't figured this out yet, please heed this advice. Life is short. Enjoy it! Dust if you must, but wouldn't it be better to paint a picture or write a letter, bake a cake or plant a seed, ponder the difference between want and need? Dust if you must, but there's not much time, with rivers to swim and mountains to climb, music to hear and books to read, friends to cherish and life to lead. Dust if you must, but the world's out there with the sun in your eyes the wind in your hair, a flutter of snow,a shower of rain. This day will not come around again. It's not what you gather, but what you scatter that tells what kind of life you have lived.
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

06-09-2006, 06:18 PM	#58 (permalink)
mollie Ancestry Aid Staff Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Isle of Man Posts: 1,683 Total Awards: 2	Re: Poems that you find *Thought this might make you chuckle . Try saying it after one or three............lol* Ned Nott was shot and Sam Shott was not. So it's better to be Shott than Nott. Some say Nott was not shot, but Shott swears he shot Nott. Either the shot Shott shot at Nott was not shot or Nott was shot. If the shot Shott shot shot Nott, Nott was shot. But if the shot Shott shot shot Shott himself, Then Shott would be shot and Nott would not. However, the shot Shott shot shot not Shott but Nott. It's easy to say who was shot and who was not. But we know who was Shott and who was Nott. *anon.*
	Mollie Ancestry Aid Moderator The UK's No 1 For Genealogy & Family History. Top Tip: Use the forum search page to find surnames!!. Dunne,McManus, McCann,O'Dowd, Higgins, Smith, Traynor, O'Byrne, Lamond/t Henry/Nicolson/Bowman/McCafferty/Keelan and more....did I say Smith...oh yes I did...we all have one.........lol

09-11-2007, 05:44 PM	#59 (permalink)
izabellanne New Member Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: Warwickshire Posts: 8	Re: Poems that you find I love this poem my cousin sent me for my birthday this year. I thought I would share it with you... Dear, dear Ann,If you could see your cousins All standing in a row, Could YOU tell one from t'other ? How would you really know ? And if it was their birthday on 20th September, And you never bought a card Because you didn't remember, Could you possibly write a pome To make up for senile doziness ? Saying "Have a wonderful time, And may all your birthdays bring coziness, Dishy cakes and super presents, Plus everyone's affection For this world's funniest cousin, Absolutely without exception. I wish you TONS of presents, And birthday cards galore, For YOU should ever be celebrated, That's what birthdays are for. I wish you HAPPY BIRTHDAY, I'm SO sorry I missed the date, Will make up for it at Xmas, If that ain't too late. Meanwhile celebrate yourself For all the joy you bring To everyone who knows you, You really make us sing.
	Clucas...Hodge...Amos....Woodhall....Dugmore...

09-11-2007, 07:48 PM	#60 (permalink)
Starlight Ancestry Aid Manager Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: South Essex Posts: 15,912 Total Awards: 8	Re: Poems that you find What a lovely poem izabellanne. Better than any card.
	Starlight Ancestry Aid Manager Hampshire:- Barks, Bartholomew, Carpenter, Cousens, Cousins, Dumper, Gallagher, Goodchild, Glasspool, Hoskins, Light, Mason, Monday, Mundy, Pearce, Pitt, Shepherd, Spreadbury, Staniford, Terrill, Thornton, Warne, Webb, Woodford & many more. Top Tip: Use the forum search engine