Thread: Laundry Stains

petal · 07-04-2006, 01:43 PM

LAUNDRY STAIN REMOVAL GUIDE

Here's a handy guide to getting out those pesky fabric stains:
Blood - Spill more blood around area of stain so it won't stand out as much.
Ink - Fall to knees and plead, "Why, God, why? Why dost thou test me so?"
Grass - Write the name of your liquid detergent on stain. Wash. Hold up to camera, and show off the unbelievable results.
Mud - Place large iron-on NASCAR patch over stain. Apply heat for 60 seconds.
Tomato Sauce - Take out the mook responsible for your tomato-sauce stain by executing him gangland-style in the back of the head. Capeche?
Coffee - Rub cream and sugar into stain. Apply oral suction. Enjoy rich, robust coffee-stain flavor.
Wine - Apply mixture of 1/2 rum and 1/2 Coke to self until you no longer care about some little freaking stain.
Chewing Gum - Using permanent marker, draw dotted line around stain. Cut carefully on dotted line.
Nail Polish - Nail-polish stains are actually quite lovely. Why not leave them in for a pleasing "homecrafted" look?

07-04-2006, 01:43 PM	#1 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,637 Total Awards: 5	Laundry Stains LAUNDRY STAIN REMOVAL GUIDE Here's a handy guide to getting out those pesky fabric stains: Blood - Spill more blood around area of stain so it won't stand out as much. Ink - Fall to knees and plead, "Why, God, why? Why dost thou test me so?" Grass - Write the name of your liquid detergent on stain. Wash. Hold up to camera, and show off the unbelievable results. Mud - Place large iron-on NASCAR patch over stain. Apply heat for 60 seconds. Tomato Sauce - Take out the mook responsible for your tomato-sauce stain by executing him gangland-style in the back of the head. Capeche? Coffee - Rub cream and sugar into stain. Apply oral suction. Enjoy rich, robust coffee-stain flavor. Wine - Apply mixture of 1/2 rum and 1/2 Coke to self until you no longer care about some little freaking stain. Chewing Gum - Using permanent marker, draw dotted line around stain. Cut carefully on dotted line. Nail Polish - Nail-polish stains are actually quite lovely. Why not leave them in for a pleasing "homecrafted" look?
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...