Thread: Computer terms

petal · 12-02-2006, 04:39 PM

COMPUTER TERMS

* PCMCIA -People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms
* ISDN - It Still Does Nothing
* SCSI - System Can't See It
* DOS - Defective Operating System
* BASIC - Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control
* IBM - I Blame Microsoft
* DEC - Do Expect Cuts
* CD-ROM - Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months
* OS/2 - Obsolete Soon, Too.
* WWW - World Wide Wait
* MACINTOSH - Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs
* PENTIUM - Produces Erroneous Numbers Thru Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics
* COBOL - Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language
* AMIGA - A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction
* LISP - Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis
* MIPS - Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed
* WINDOWS - Will Install Needless Data On Whole System
* MICROSOFT - Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers
*RISC - Reduced Into Silly Code

And more....

* BIT - A word used to describe computers, as in "Our son's computer cost quite a bit."
* BOOT - What your friends give you because you spend too much time bragging about your computer skills.
* BUG - What your eyes do after you stare at the tiny green computer screen for more than 15 minutes. Also: what computer magazine companies do to you after they get your name on their mailing list.
* CHIPS - The fattening, non-nutritional food computer users eat to avoid having to leave their keyboards for meals.
* COPY - What you have to do during school tests because you spend too much time at the computer and not enough time studying.
* CURSOR - What you turn into when you can't get your computer to perform, as in "You $#% computer!"
* DISK - What goes out in your back after bending over a computer keyboard for seven hours at a clip.
* DUMP - The place all your former hobbies wind up soon after you install your computer.
* ERROR - What you made the first time you walked into a computer showroom to "just look."
* EXPANSION UNIT - The new room you have to build on to your home to house your computer and all its peripherals.
* FILE - What your secretary can now do to her nails six and a half hours a day, now that the computer does her day's work in 30 minutes.
* FLOPPY - The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food (see Chips).
* HARDWARE - Tools, such as lawnmowers, rakes and other heavy equipment you haven't laid a finger on since getting your computer.
* IBM - The kind of missile your family members and friends would like to drop on your computer so you'll pay attention to them again.
* MENU - What you'll never see again after buying a computer because you'll be too poor to eat in a restaurant.
* MONITOR - Often thought to be a word associated with computers, this word actually refers to those obnoxious kids who always want to see your hall pass at school.
* PROGRAMS - Those things you used to look at on your television before you hooked your computer up to it.
* RETURN - What lots of people do with their computers after only a week and a half.
* TERMINAL - A place where you can find buses, trains and really good deals on hot computers.
* WINDOW - What you heave the computer out of after you accidentally erase a program that took you three days to set up.

Starlight · 12-02-2006, 09:49 PM

Very good Mary.

Chris · 12-02-2006, 09:51 PM

brilliant mary

12-02-2006, 04:39 PM	#1 (permalink)
petal Super Member Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Horncastle, Lincolnshire Posts: 8,557 Total Awards: 5	Computer terms COMPUTER TERMS * PCMCIA -People Can't Memorize Computer Industry Acronyms * ISDN - It Still Does Nothing * SCSI - System Can't See It * DOS - Defective Operating System * BASIC - Bill's Attempt to Seize Industry Control * IBM - I Blame Microsoft * DEC - Do Expect Cuts * CD-ROM - Consumer Device, Rendered Obsolete in Months * OS/2 - Obsolete Soon, Too. * WWW - World Wide Wait * MACINTOSH - Most Applications Crash; If Not, The Operating System Hangs * PENTIUM - Produces Erroneous Numbers Thru Incorrect Understanding of Mathematics * COBOL - Completely Obsolete Business Oriented Language * AMIGA - A Merely Insignificant Game Addiction * LISP - Lots of Infuriating & Silly Parenthesis * MIPS - Meaningless Indication of Processor Speed * WINDOWS - Will Install Needless Data On Whole System * MICROSOFT - Most Intelligent Customers Realize Our Software Only Fools Teenagers RISC - Reduced Into Silly Code And more.... BIT - A word used to describe computers, as in "Our son's computer cost quite a bit." * BOOT - What your friends give you because you spend too much time bragging about your computer skills. * BUG - What your eyes do after you stare at the tiny green computer screen for more than 15 minutes. Also: what computer magazine companies do to you after they get your name on their mailing list. * CHIPS - The fattening, non-nutritional food computer users eat to avoid having to leave their keyboards for meals. * COPY - What you have to do during school tests because you spend too much time at the computer and not enough time studying. * CURSOR - What you turn into when you can't get your computer to perform, as in "You $#% computer!" * DISK - What goes out in your back after bending over a computer keyboard for seven hours at a clip. * DUMP - The place all your former hobbies wind up soon after you install your computer. * ERROR - What you made the first time you walked into a computer showroom to "just look." * EXPANSION UNIT - The new room you have to build on to your home to house your computer and all its peripherals. * FILE - What your secretary can now do to her nails six and a half hours a day, now that the computer does her day's work in 30 minutes. * FLOPPY - The condition of a constant computer user's stomach due to lack of exercise and a steady diet of junk food (see Chips). * HARDWARE - Tools, such as lawnmowers, rakes and other heavy equipment you haven't laid a finger on since getting your computer. * IBM - The kind of missile your family members and friends would like to drop on your computer so you'll pay attention to them again. * MENU - What you'll never see again after buying a computer because you'll be too poor to eat in a restaurant. * MONITOR - Often thought to be a word associated with computers, this word actually refers to those obnoxious kids who always want to see your hall pass at school. * PROGRAMS - Those things you used to look at on your television before you hooked your computer up to it. * RETURN - What lots of people do with their computers after only a week and a half. * TERMINAL - A place where you can find buses, trains and really good deals on hot computers. * WINDOW - What you heave the computer out of after you accidentally erase a program that took you three days to set up.
	(AKA Mary) How beautiful it is to do nothing and rest afterwards...

12-02-2006, 09:49 PM	#2 (permalink)
Starlight Ancestry Aid Manager Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: South Essex Posts: 15,921 Total Awards: 8	Very good Mary.
	Starlight Ancestry Aid Manager Hampshire:- Barks, Bartholomew, Carpenter, Cousens, Cousins, Dumper, Gallagher, Goodchild, Glasspool, Hoskins, Light, Mason, Monday, Mundy, Pearce, Pitt, Shepherd, Spreadbury, Staniford, Terrill, Thornton, Warne, Webb, Woodford & many more. Top Tip: Use the forum search engine

12-02-2006, 09:51 PM	#3 (permalink)
Chris Ancestry Aid Owner Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: UK - England Posts: 5,466	brilliant mary
	Chris Ancestry Aid Owner